if you need me, call me
otherwise expect to hear from me in 3-5 business days
Do you feel like we are giving people too much access to ourselves these days? I remember how cool MSN was as a child. Being able to chat with friends online in real time (wifi dependent) felt like the future. And if you didn’t want to talk to anyone? You could appear offline. Somewhere along the way we lost that button. Now, instant messaging is more of a pain, right?
Text-based communication is where I feel it most. To me, texts are for transactions. “Where are you?” “Please can you help order this?” “What’s the Netflix/Prime/[insert streaming service that I bankroll for my family here] password?” They are discrete exchanges with a clear opening and close. The trouble starts when there’s no transaction. “Hey, how are you?” opens a conversation with no natural end. A few messages are exchanged, then one of us puts their phone down and doesn’t respond for a few days (maybe weeks). When we finally remember, we’re either trying to pick up a long-forgotten conversation or hitting reset on the whole thing. There is no real conclusion. It’s access that never logs off.
That’s why I am more partial to the novel idea of using my phone to make actual phone calls. Well, more often than not FaceTime and video calls, but calls nonetheless.
While calls are about as direct as virtual access gets, they are contained. There is a beginning and an end. The conversation is far more focused and intentional. No typos, no being left on read. Whether we’re on the line for 10 minutes or 3 hours, I hang up feeling like we’ve actually connected. It’s nice.
So I usually joke that with texts, I’ll respond in 3-5 business days, and with WhatsApp, you’ll hear from me in 1-4 weeks. Recently, I don’t think I’ve even been meeting those SLAs. It’s poor form on my end, for sure. But truly, if you need me, call me.
Unless, of course, you’re a client. Then please, email me.
Work is where the access question really gets to me. I’m not a fan of when clients Teams me. It feels too up close and personal, like they’re creeping into my space. An email waits patiently in my inbox for a thoughtful reply. A Teams message is an interruption, a tap on the shoulder while I’m in the middle of something else.
And then there are the people who skip the introduction from a colleague or an email entirely and DM you as a first point of contact. Absolutely not. I don’t know about you, but my parents taught me stranger danger.
“I have been known to call them my unofficial communications policy.”